I was angry tonight. 

I didn’t know it was anger until I tried to release it but the feelings of sadness and despair soon turned to hard, hot tears and a violent heart. 

I was angry with God. I was angry that He is perfect and I couldn’t blame Him. I was angry that He wouldn’t just let everything be perfect and stop bad things from happening. But He knows the weight of the lessons we learn and the value of the character formed in the process – formed with His help of course. 

I can’t blame Him for the mistakes I’ve made. I can’t blame Him for the lies and devastation – He was warning us all along. 

But He doesn’t judge me for my anger.

And the truth is, though He was the only good thing all along, He did take the blame…

For all of it. 

Jesus took the blows for every sin, bore the weight of every curse and wrongdoing, so that I, we, could be free of it. 

With no guilt for our past and no condemnation in our present. And a joyful hope for our future. 

So I am humbled by His perfection. And I am humbled by His love. 

What a God.